How to fall in love, then stay in love

January 2, 2010


I was stuck at SFO for a four hour window when I found this magazine.




The cover article blew me away because it’s an easy concise sum-up of several of the techniques we used at the Deida event.  Rather than simple psychology on intellectual ideas, it’s filled with actual techniques that create love on a physiological level.  Great for generating it, or for keeping it.


It’s on magazine stands now, or download it here.

$10 to feed a family for a week

December 31, 2009


I was touched by Keith Ferrazi’s Facebook post about his trip to Guatemala:

The staple of their diet is a tortilla with a little salt to give it taste. one woman shred a story of christmas this year where she told her kids that tonight they would eat tortillas but because they had none she pretended and boiled rocks and sat next …to the fire all night until the kids gave out from exhaustion and went to sleep. She at least wanted the kids to go to sleep thinking that they would have food.


Here is where you can give $10 to feed a family for two weeks.


Tonight is a great night to do it.  It’s what I call the “sacrifice to the party gods.”  Just before the weekend or a party starts, I like to give to a charity to remember that while I get to go out and have a good time, there are others who cannot even eat.

The Best is Yet to Come (The David Deida Experience: Epilogue)

December 28, 2009


Does this sound familiar to you? You know someone who goes off to a weekend seminar, and they come back “a new person.” They can’t stop talking about it, and yet they don’t make much sense except for their clear message that you have to do the same thing, and at worst, they’ll think less of you if you don’t.  And then several weeks later, they’re back to their old selves, their old bad habits, and nothing really changed.


Well, that was not what happened to me. Quite the opposite (which is why I’m conveying all of this weeks after the event).


The first day I got back, I felt a sore throat come on all of the sudden.  By the next day I woke up and thought, “If I could simply feel completely awful, that would be a massive improvement.”  I went to the doctor who diagnosed me with swine flu. That was a fun week, but it got worse…


I coughed so much for two weeks that I would wake up at all hours.  Codeine, Robitussin and a healthy shot of Nyquil couldn’t stop the coughing.  It was painful and I couldn’t sleep. I went on a 10-day course of antibiotics, and it was still there. I went through a Z-pack 5-day course of antibiotics as well.


Some could say I simply got sick, but my belief is that I was clearing out years worth of pain around my heart. Pain, memories and a loneliness I had not acknowledged.  One of the worst nights I was lying at home in my apartment, thinking dreadfully, “If I were to die this weekend, no one would even look for me till Wednesday.”  Dramatic, of course, but what hit me over those two weeks as I watched awful reality shows and sat on my couch eating loads of comfort foods was just how alone I felt, and how ready I was for all that to change.


By Thanksgiving the cloud finally began to lift.  And that’s when I realized why all of this happened, because there’s a big part of this story I left out…


You see, by Thanksgiving, I knew the first woman I saw at the hotel before the Deida event would become the love of my life.  (update: Not really, but it was a great relationship and we learned a lot)


But that’s another story, for another time 😉

Save 400 lives, NOW (and look good doing it)

December 8, 2009


There are many causes to champion, but my favorites are the ones that clearly, without a doubt save lives.  Clean water….How can life truly be possible when your children are drinking from polluted swamps?




In January I dedicated my birthday to raising enough money to build a well that would provide 400 people safe drinking water.  All of the money goes to building the well because Charity Water’s administration costs are covered by sponsorships.


It is not complete. And I have less than a month to fund this well.





But this is not about making me look good. 
This is about making YOU look good… literally.


In exchange for helping NOW… I’m offering a gift…


Some of you know that that I co-founded a fashion company called “The NOW Project” – a clothing and jewelry line dedicated to inspiring people to live in the moment, and make a difference immediately.  Together, my partners and I helped bring yoga to at-risk youth.




We had a line of jewelry and clothing designed by the wunderkind talent, Erica Rose Trumpower. Our flagship product was “The NOW Watch.”  It was a reminder to be in the NOW.  I called it “The Reverse Time Machine” – rather than going to the future or the past, you go to the present… it’s a watch that does not tell time.




But they never came to market…
It’s a very long story, but even though we fought for two years for the trademark that our brand eventually received, we were sued by a brand that owned the word “now” on all watches.  While we had a 50% chance of winning, the cost and time involved would have killed us.


These are the remaining NOW pieces. And here are the reasons I think you’d like one:

  • They are contraband.  You won’t see find this on the free market
  • They cost us over $1500 each (R/D, production costs, legal, etc)
  • Designed with unique shapes to an eye-catching conversation starter
  • Stainless steel, heavy quality design
  • Makes a great gift for the holidays

The first 9 people who donate at least $75 to fund this well, will get a NOW piece.


1.  Go here to donate $75 or more!
2.  Email me your receipt ([email protected])
3.  Tell me if you prefer a men’s or women’s piece


As I said, only nine remain, so I’ll give them on first come, first serve basis.


Thank you for reading this far, and thank you for being a part of this!

It came out magical…out from blown speakers

December 4, 2009


From Blown Speakers by The New Pornographers

The Invitation


It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what
you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s

It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will
risk looking like a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure
of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to
know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have
been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain,
mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can
dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your
fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic,
to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want
to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you
can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; If
you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it’s not pretty, every
day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still
stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full
moon, “Yes!”

It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you
have. I want to know if you can get up, after a night of grief and
despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want
to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not
shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I
want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like
the company you keep in the empty moments.

The Invitation
by Oriah Mountain Dreamer